I can't stop thinking about how at this time one year ago some of you heard of our little family and began praying for Reese and me. I was six months pregnant with her, in the hospital with meningitis and encephalitis and close to death. In GOD's sovereignty and by countless prayers we pulled through that terrible time to face another devastation in August with Reese.
I am convinced GOD prompted people to begin praying for us last May in order to build a FIRM foundation of strength, peace and love that we would need in the months ahead and still now. Only He knew what we were going to face. The Lord knew we would need many mighty prayer warriors when our daughter was born.
I remember like it was yesterday being so thankful that they did not have to deliver Reese when I was sick. We were praising the Lord she was ok. Our little fighter. She had three more months to grow and thrive inside me. Besides, I had an entire summer planned with Zach before his little sister arrived. He was at such a fun stage, and I wanted to savor every moment with him. ; )
At that time the worst thing in the world was for her to have been born three months early and have to stay in the NICU at Children's. What problems would she have? How could Jason and I spend three months apart while he worked and I stayed with our daughter? Who would take care of Zach? Knowing what we know now we would have been begging the doctors to deliver her.
I really can't go there, but it's strange living through this spring and looking ahead at summer remembering so easily everything that happened up to Reese's birth. So many details.
GOD is here. He was with us then. As I became disoriented and lost motor skills. On the mediflight to a different hospital in another city. While I was pricked with countless needles. During those painful sleepless nights in the hospital. As I drifted in and out of reality. When the doctors threatened a feeding tube because I wouldn't eat. When I couldn't stand, walk or bathe alone. When I told Jason that if I went to Heaven at least he would have Zach.
His quiet presence. He sits with me as I look back. He holds my hand and allows me to sift through my feelings. He is the same GOD. He is still working.
It's amazing to me that you continue to care so much and reach out to bless our family. We are changed because of GOD's hand shown through you. Thank you thank you.
Why must I go about in sorrow..? Send me Your light and Your truth; let them lead me. Then I will come to the alter of GOD, to GOD, my greatest joy.