I feel like I am in a very unfamiliar stage of grief. When Reese's 18 month birthday came I began to feel the dust settle from what we have been through and face daily. As I look at my family with our wonderful precious boys, I deeply grieve the little girl in the middle. It's so hard to let my heart share both joy and pain. It's a huge battle that neither wins.
This time has taken me by surprise, but grief just does that. I miss Reese so much and feel raw again. Right when I feel like I can't take it, it hurts too badly, it's too heavy a burden to bear, I pick myself up and take the next step. Depending on GOD's mercy and grace that only He can give me for that day.
I'm trying to see what the LORD has for me here. In this place. I don't want to miss it, I just wish I could learn without so many tears.
This does make me smile. I know it's silly, but I like little things like this. I had a Pottery Barn gift card, and I wanted to use it on something I would buy at some point anyway. This monkey stood out to me because we think Colson kind of looks like a baby gorilla. Maybe it's just the hair. ; )
I will give you the treasures of darkness and riches from secret places, so that you may know that I, the LORD...call you by your name.