Pieces

Something very special to me concerning Reese was torn apart. Zach didn't do it to be mean, but he gave it to Colson who ate it and pulled it apart. I was devastated. All I could think was how many toys we have scattered throughout our house that are Zach and Colson's and one thing that was important to me was gone?

Just like her.

I texted a few of my prayers warriors, and one responded, "I don't know what broke, but save the pieces. My sister in law has made some neat things out of special broken things."

Save the pieces.

Those words spoke to me, and I thought about them all day long. I compared the broken pieces to the pieces my heart. 


Pieces of pain, tears, frustrations, anxiety, confusion, hopelessness. Pieces that over two years later even I don't understand. Pieces that don't fit together the way they used to, but maybe just the way GOD intended them to.


Are the pieces even worth saving? He says they are.


Can the LORD put my heart back together? He is.


Can He fill me with joy, faith, hope, and peace where only emptiness and questions remain? He promise is yes.


Reese is gone, and she is with my Heavenly Father. My heart is broken, but He is my Healer. He is faithful, and I choose to trust Him. 


With all my broken pieces.


Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God.

Psalm 42:5-6

Pictures, Weekend & Recipe

Lisa took Colson's 18 month pictures a few weeks ago and has a sneak peek on her blog. She did a wonderful job as always! Colson was a bit of a disaster that morning so I was really worried. His hair was crazy, and he was just not happy. That's life though, right? ; )


Z has loved having Jason and me to himself, and whenever I ask if he misses Colson he says, "No" although I know deep down he does. ; )

 He was all smiles this morning before church. I've had a fun weekend lovin' on my little man.

For all your bread lovers out there, here is my mom's homemade bread recipe. Delicious!


2 cups milk
1 cup sugar
3/4 cup Crisco
2 pkg. yeast into 1/4 cup lukewarm water


Heat enough to melt shortening. Pour into crock and add 2 cups cold water. When lukewarm, pour in yeast mixture and add enough flour to make batter (around 6 cups).


Let rise (45 - 60 minutes)


Add to first mixture - 
5 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. baking powder


Combine and add a little flour (1/2 cup). Stir well and add enough flour to make stiff dough (1 to 2 cups of flour). Put a couple of large mixing spoonfuls in each greased pan. Let rise.


Brush with melted butter. Bake in oven 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Turn down to 300 and bake for 20 - 25 minutes. Makes 3 to 4 loaves.


If you have any specific questions please feel free to email me. ; )


So don't throw away your confidence...


Hebrews 10:35

Coffee & Flat Irons

I love trying out new little coffee drinks in the winter. There is just nothing like it! Yesterday I tried a white chocolate mocha. I don't like actual coffee, but I love flavored cappuccinos. It's crazy.

I will absolutely post my mom's bread recipe, but I want to share something else first.


When several of my friends started using flat irons forever ago, I thought I didn't need to try it because my hair has always been so flat. Which was fine with me. ; ) I had alopecia as a little girl, so I'm really thankful just to have hair.


I also didn't have time to mess with one, had no idea where to start looking, and didn't care enough to spend the money on it. I bought a cheap one to put a few waves in my hair sometimes but that's about all. 


BUT I do love when my stylist uses one when I get my hair cut.

So...when Brian from Hana asked if I would review the Titanium 
1.5" flat iron I said, "Yes!" 

 I was surprised when it came in the mail. There were all sorts of goodies in the box like two cases, a towel, lip gloss, bath petals, hand sanitizer, shine shield, a brush and a few nail files.

I love it and use it everyday. It takes very little time to do, which is good for moms since we don't have much extra time anyway. ; ) 

Hana has a top 10 Best Flat Irons list and sells curling irons and hair dryers, too.

Brian has been wonderful to work with and I'm happy to recommend Hana products to anyone.

Have a wonderful weekend! Colson is with Jason's parents getting spoiled so I'm excited to have some one-on-one time with Zach. ; )


Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised...


James 1:12

WILW

Hey, ya'll! It's late, but I'm going to make What I'm Lovin' Wednesday. ; )

I'm loving Beth Moore's James Bible study.

I'm loving that my mom came for a little visit...

and made her famous homemade bread.

I love playing trains with the boys.

I love seeing this sweetie playing peek-a-boo.

I love my FIL & MIL!

I love watching friendships grow.

 I love red rain boots on a rainy day.

I love expresso yogurt with snickers and a little bit of butterfinger.
(I promise I'm working on an exercise post. Ha!)


I love American Idol.

I'm loving that this cutie started AWANA tonight! I'm so excited about everything he will learn about Jesus and the Bible.

I love sleeping with seven pillows. ; ) Night!


 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault...


James 1:5

All About Z

I want to remember what Zach is like at this age and what he is up to. He is always saying and doing the funniest things. The grandparents may be the only ones who care about this post!

I still can't believe he is four. He has Jason's long legs and a killer smile. He has a tender heart, and he's working on consistently sharing and being sweet to Colson. ; )

Every morning when he wakes up he has to get out of his pjs and put on his play clothes. I have no idea why it's just what he likes to do! He does this by himself before he ever comes downstairs. He usually picks out a green shirt. ; )

He then sneaks downstairs and tries to scare me. I'm usually in the bathroom getting ready and even when I hear his little footsteps he always makes me jump.

Most days he asks me, "Where are we going today?" or "What's the plan?"

One day he saw me writing in my calendar (a Momagenda...love it!), and said, "Does that book tell us what we do?"

On the way to school or Bible study or the gym he eats a granola bar because he usually sleeps so late there is not enough time to eat at our house.

Whenever we leave the house he has to take one or two or five things with him. He usually picks out cars and puts them in his pockets.

He only naps once or twice a week now (sigh...but we've had a great run so I'm not complaining!), but he goes to bed easily around 7:30. Our nights are much more calm. ; )

He does get shy sometimes when we are in public, and he's like a different kid! He will hide beside me until he warms up.

I love watching him give Colson one of his favorite toys to play with.

I love seeing when he stops himself before getting upset and rephrases what he wants or needs. 

I love that he wants me to still hold him.

I love that he is talking more and more about his sister Reese.

Z and I have some of our best conversations in the car. Recently he told me while I was driving that he wanted to fly to the moon in a rocket ship one day. This led to us talking about flying and how angels fly and why it's dark at night and why we can't see Heaven. 

He then asked me if Jesus and Reese could fly, and out of no where he said, "Jesus carries Reese." I guess he was thinking if Jesus could fly then He must carry Reese since she is a baby. Just hearing his little voice say this was the sweetest thing. 


I love that he is connecting his sister to so many things, and I love talking with him about her.


Four is a fun age minus the fits. ; )


For He is our peace...


Ephesians 2:14

Will You Be My Valentine?

I have something fun to share today! My sweet friend Nicole is offering some free Valentine templates. To download please go to her freebie facebook page.


 You can choose from two photoshop templates to customize for your child (boy or girl) or download a sheet of the "U make my heart burst!" tags to put on Starburst candies.


Each photoshop template is 2.5 x 3.5 so two should fit on a 5x7 print.


For more information go to Nicole's blog.

Aren't these too cute?

Nicole created Reese's 1st year card with me, and it turned out perfectly. Just what I wanted. ; ) Be looking for one of her giveaways here soon, too!


My little Valentines

I'm excited about using these cards for the boys' class parties. ; )


Thanks, Nicole!


He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love...


Zephaniah 3:17

Reese's Gifts

Our families are always so thoughtful and creative with their gifts and donations in honor of Reese during the holidays. I won't point anyone out, but they're too special not to share. ; )

"R" ornament

Angel wings ring
This looks a lot like the symbol on the shirts we had make for Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.


Donations were made to both Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep and Kids' Soccer Africa.

  These sweet blankets, headbands and bows for the NICU

Maybe these can even give ya'll some ideas for what to do or give to someone close to you who has lost a baby.

Jason and I are deeply touched and thankful!

...Your word is my source of hope.

Psalm 119:114

Pumpkins in Winter

Z got into some cookie cutters and told me he wanted to make pumpkin cookies. So we did!

Looking good so far. ; )

Adding some sprinkles

Somehow we lost our pumpkins! Oh well. We had fun. ; )

The Spirit is the One who gives life...

John 6:63

Winner

Thank you all for entering!

The winner is #91.


Congrats Margot at Find Your Spark!


I will email you with the details. ; )


Good night, ya'll.

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Proverbs 4:23

18 Months Giveaway

Thank you for sharing your stories and lives with me through comments and emails. I love hearing your perspective on how Reese has affected you even though some of us have never met! She is such a daily part of my life, and it's a sweet surprise to hear how she has entered your world, too.

I stand in my daughter's shadow, and it's a special place to be.

Her little brother Colson is 18 months old today. ; )

Are ya'll tired of Picky Sticky giveaways yet? I hope not!

 Colson, you are a little love.

 You bring sunshine to my heart every day.

 You're getting so big!

 You just started sitting by Zach at a little table to eat. It's the cutest thing.

 You love playing with your big brother.

You laugh all the time and have a twinkle in your eye that melts my heart!

We love you, Colson! Happy 18 months.

Leave a comment to win a Gift Voucher for $15 on a set of Picky Stickys.

Don't forget to leave your email address if this is the best way for me to contact you.

I'll announce the winner Sunday night!

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:21 

Strong Genes & Link

Look familiar? This is Jason's dad when he was 16 months old. We think Colson kind of looks like him. ; )

This is Jason when he was 3 years old. See Zach? I do! Those Rowe genes are strong. Handsome boys!

The link to Reese's story is up, and I'm so happy. It just feels right and hopefully will clear up some questions about our daughter. My prayer is that our family can shed some light on what it's like to lose a child and the hope we have in Christ. 


The LORD has used so many of you to show His faithfulness. Thank you!

Oh, that we might know the LORD! Let us press on to know Him.

Hosea 6:3

First Day Back

I love Christmas break, but I also love routine with a little flexibility. ; ) The boys started back to school today, and everyone was excited about it.

The winter/spring semester has begun!

For nothing is impossible with GOD.

Luke 1:37

the Cotton Bowl

We went to the Cotton Bowl with my family and had so much fun! It was a fast trip with very little sleep, but that's just life right now. Lots of laughter though!

One night I found my sister wandering around her house with blankets looking for somewhere to sleep. Colson slept in her closet, and I had been up with him. Bless her heart!

Abby and Z were joined at the hip pretty much the entire time. These two are a mess.

Abs was so sweet with Colson and let him "drive" her around.

Z got his first haircut by someone other than Jason in years. The woman did a wonderful job and there was all sorts of entertainment to keep him still.

He was not thrilled.

the girls

the guys

Out of that huge stadium one of my besties was just one section over from us. I loved seeing Laura! What a jewel.

Go Hogs!


Sovereign LORD...what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do the deeds and mighty works You do? 


Deuteronomy 3:24